Be Careful My Friends

New Year Countdown

I’m not sure what’s worse: the eggnog hangover, the embarrassing failed Nano attempt, the tryptophan coma or the fear of standing in line to return something. No wait, there’s more—the holidays are not over yet and anything can happen. Let’s make it to 2013 in one piece. On that note, I’ll remind you there are DUI checkpoints on various corners this week and they probably won’t let you read this in jail. Please be careful. For those who survived the recent hurricanes, twisters, blackouts, floods, storms, tsunamis and earthquakes, it’s a miracle we all just survived the Mayan apocalypse and grandma's thawed and re-gifted fruitcake. On top of everything, the newscasters keep telling us about a fiscal cliff. Sounds horrible if you're a lemming or Scrooge.  So you can see there’s no need for searching out trouble. Like Santa or a bad STD--it will find you if it wants to. Trouble that is. Haven’t you seen those shingles commercials? Trouble has GPS and goes sniffing around even the cutest, cleanest and kindest folks. It’s that strange hazy entity that cannot be stopped by any force except possibly prayer, but since I’m not here to debate faith and the tangled webs our religions seem to weave, I just want to offer a kind parental suggestion that you don’t text while driving and bring water if you plan on hiking in the desert. 

Where's Santa and Why is There a Chihuahua on My Roof?

Twas the Day before Christmas

Twas the day before Christmas, when all throughout town,

Everyone was shopping, executive or clown.

Seemed no one hung stockings, they didn’t have time

And Saint Nicholas was a myth from a holiday rhyme.

The kids played video games while on the couch--

Watching a show ‘bout a green sort of grouch.

Dad had some brewskis with some of his pals,

And I had happy hour with some of the gals.

Then out in the driveway I heard a big noise—

Figured it must have been one of the boys—

Ran to the window to see what it was—

Got tangled in window shades from having a buzz.

Perhaps due to my Cabernet--

A full moon glowed above a red cabriolet,

An angel opened her purse and this is what I saw--

A Chihuahua reaching out a miniature paw?

The little dog, so lively and quick--

I knew for a fact, it wasn’t St. Nick.

The seraph petted its smooth coat of hair,

So she’d stop barking at everyone there.

 

“Oh Fiona,” she said, “please don’t scare them away,

This is important, just do as I say.

Take those bony legs onto the roof,

Prance like a reindeer uses a hoof.”

Like a tornado she zoomed up and past,

I've never seen anything move quite so fast.

Dragging behind her a bag full of toys,

She had to disperse to all the girls and my boys.

I soon heard some barking,

Scratching and digging-

And moments before whence there wasn't a sound,

I now heard puppy yelping when I turned around.

Wearing only her collar and a tiny tag,

I wondered aloud what she had in her bag,

Astride on her haunches she nosed open the ties--

Looking ever so poised and adorably wise.

Her eyes how they twinkled, her nose pink and pert.

Her ears like antennas stayed up and alert.

Sharp incisors worked the bindings,

Yielding the presents, she was hiding.

Gifts spilled from the bag from using her teeth,

She circled and danced in the shape of a wreath.

Wagging her tail with obvious glee,

She stopped for a second and let out a pee.

Hardly four pounds, a miniature elf,

I laughed when I saw her in spite of myself.

Those ears were enough to bring me to tears,

Though she grumbled and growled, I had nothing to fear.

For seconds she hopped around on the rafters,

Filling my house with undying laughter.

When she finished and dived from the eaves,

I saw her take off, getting ready to leave.

She sprang behind the angel into the car--

A wisp of happiness, a gold little star.

And I heard her exclaim, ‘ere they drove quickly away,

“Happy Christmas to all and to all a great day.”

By Eve Gaal

 My humble apologies to Clement Clarke Moore

Can't get enough of Fiona? Order Not Your Mother's Book on Dogs and turn to page 223 (Available on Amazon in print or for Kindle)Click Here:

The Next Big Thing!!!

The Next Big Thing 

is where someone tags you as an author worth noting and you, in turn, tag five other authors.

I recently had the honor of being tagged by two great authors!

Beverly Willett-

Last week a friend of mine, Beverly Willett, a great writer who works on the Coalition for Divorce Reform, asked me to participate in the Next Big Thing online event. The Next Big Thing is a way for authors and bloggers to share the news about their most exciting upcoming projects.

Beverly is a former lawyer, but don’t hold that against her! She is working on multiple writing projects, and you can meet her here at her blog: http://beverlywillett.com/blog. I think you’ll agree that her lively writing style is very entertaining. In addition, she is clearly passionate about helping to improve family stability in our country. She’s not afraid to look at all possibilities to achieve this. Here’s her article in the Huffington Post on the number-one problem facing our country.

Lori Lowe-

Lori’s book is titled: First Kiss to Lasting Bliss: Hope & Inspiration for Your Marriage. It tells the stories of a dozen couples who found that adversity could actually strengthen their marriages. It’s available on Amazon. You can also find her blog here: http://marriagegems.com

Thank you ladies for choosing me for The Next Big Thing!

Here are my responses to The Next Big Thing questions.

What is the working title of your book?

Penniless Hearts.

Where did the idea come from for the book?

I spent many years in the newspaper business which is essentially about communication and  found it perplexing that communication was a serious issue. So this book is a romantic adventure on the surface with an underlying message about communication and personal growth.

What genre does your book fall under? 

Woman’s Fiction?

Romance?

Adventure?

                                                             

Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?  

I've often thought that Zooey Deschanel would be lighthearted enough to play the main character. I also have a naughty pilot in my manuscript and I’d say Matthew McConaughey would be perfect.

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book? 

Overworked graphic artist stops being responsible, takes off and sets in motion a whirlwind of trouble for everyone who loves her and wants to find her until she realizes she’s a powerhouse and can overcome anything.

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

Either way would be great.

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?

Three months or so.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?

Possibly LuAnne Rice, Debbie MacComber, Alice Hoffman or Nicolas Sparks? Don’t really know because I think everyone’s writing is unique.

Who or what inspired you to write this book? 

I feel it is a like a love letter to the various graphic artists who helped me throughout my advertising career. Their talent and hard work definitely inspired me to write this book. 

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest? 

I did a lot of research on Hawaiian traditions. Also the food, flora, fauna and  things that are uniquely part of the culture help make my story more believable and meaningful. Besides the traditions, I typically enjoy pulling the reader into an escape. I think all reading can be an escape, but going to Hawaii is special, even if it’s in an armchair. Another element of fun is that everything takes place one week before Christmas.

My five picks for authors to meet and follow (in no particular order):

William Kendall

Beth Muscat

Jay Noel

Lena Winfrey Seder

Maria McKenzie

All have different styles and genre of books. They are great supporters, and writers.

For those I’ve tagged – The Next Big Thing Rules:

    Use this format for your post

    Answer the 10 questions about your current WIP (work in progress)

    Tag five other writers/bloggers and add their links so we can hop over and meet them. 

    Mention the person who tagged you.

Gifts for Readers

Still looking for gifts? Well I’m still looking too but I do have three great recommendations. I also think Amazon has ways of getting these packages to you in time.

My twisted little story about Snow White called Mirror, Mirror miraculously found its way into this lovely anthology called Open Doors-Fractured Fairy Tales. While of course I like my story, wait until you read the other hilarious renditions of childhood favorites. I keeled over from laughing at the very adult tales told from the unique perspective of humor writers from all over the world. This is the book you need when you’re feeling down in the dumps and want to smile. If you know anyone home recuperating with a broken leg from a skiing accident or from simply too much holiday excess-- bring him or her a copy of this book and you’ll make their day or if they read slowly their week. On top of all the other good news is that once the publisher pays for printing and shipping the rest of the profit is going to a children’s hospital. 

                                  Click here for cool fairy tales:

Just this week, my non-fiction story about Fiona and how she changed my life appeared in Not Your Mother’s Book on Dogs. This is the perfect book for anyone who loves puppies, man’s best friend and all the fun they seem to bring into our lives. My story called Life is Good, will make you want to rescue a little dog too! If you’re a writer, this publisher is seeking submissions for other anthologies such as an upcoming one on home improvement. I recently ordered my copy of Not Your Mother’s Book on Dogs and I know many of you have friends who would enjoy these true stories about our four legged friends. So click right here and order some gifts today.

Click here for dogs.

Any of you with iPhones and iPads might also want to check out Wit and Humor Magazine on iTunes. More laughs, cute little skits and clean jokes make for a real nice way to spend time while waiting for someone to return stuff at the mall. Look for that little red, yellow and green  button on the right:

Romantic Gift Giving Tips Part lll-

Thinking Outside The Gift Box

The most surprising and successful gift might be when the recipient gets something they love but they didn't even know they wanted or needed it. It’s the impulsive gift they would get for themselves if they could indulge in something new or special. They didn't tell anyone their secret desires and perhaps only you know what's stirring in their heart. They also didn't tell anyone about wanting something specific, but you figured out what they would like based on hints they gave you throughout the year and by knowing their personality. You took the time to listen—the time to care— the time to love.

Observations

 Let’s stick with the aforementioned lime theme. (I mention limes in the previous post)

It was a sizzling summer day when she cut open the lime and before tossing a slice into her beer mug, she squeezed some of the juice onto her arms. “Oh, I love the smell of limes,” she said with a huge smile. You LOVE seeing that smile. Right? Now you need to figure out a way to log this information into a retrievable memory panel. (Repeating things to yourself seven times might get it into your long-term memory, but a sticky note hidden in the dark recesses of your wallet might be more practical.) Let’s say that summer day you were busy making the burgers but you took a short, extremely sensitive,—slightly metro-sexual but crucial moment to ask what exactly she loves about limes. “Is it just the smell?”

“Oh no,” she replied, “I love everything about limes. In fact it’s my favorite color.” Bingo. Now you are covered for Christmas with perfume and when St. Valentine’s Day rolls up you’ll be ready with a lime green sweater or a homemade key lime pie. Your world of gift giving just opened up like a giant ostrich egg with omelets for twelve, simply because you were attentive on a hot summer day. 

Watch each other during the commercials on television, listen to his/her comments and focus on the eyes that light up like Times Square when something they like comes into view. Yes, some women like lime green shoes. (For example, I just ordered a pair, but it is my favorite color.)

Even the most poker-faced person shows some emotion when facing their favorite things. Not only scent and color but sounds or taste can trigger a memory, leading you to ask the right questions. Does the lingering scent of Chanel No.5 remind you of someone?

Another example while sharing a box of bonbons with various fillings

"What's your favorite?"
Marzipan? What's that? Almond?
How could you not know he likes marzipan? How could you not know it reminds him of his Belgian grandmother who flew over on KLM and once on Swiss Air? She's gone now, and he hasn't had good marzipan in decades. She used to buy it at the duty-free store at the Brussels airport. "How old were you?" You ask. She visited every year when he was in grade school. Last time he saw her was seventh grade--"I loved her so much." This is priceless. Write it down in a secret place. Use shorthand if you must, but there's nothing like sentimentality to complete a shopping list. (The point here is that a few communicative questions can unearth a long lost craving for a delicious and fairly inexpensive treat.)

There’s no science to this practice and even good intentions and careful planning can result in being unappreciated.  If there’s one thing to remember it’s this: Relationships are based on give and take and if you can’t spend a little time thinking about your spouse, then you’re probably working too hard.

Your time together is priceless. 
Make it special and unforgettable. 

Hope you have the best holiday ever!